experienced really a range of moods today.
firstly, it was like fine but a little moody with something.
because it wasnt really my fault but yet i will be getting punished for it which is damn -.-
whats more, the 'punishment' doesnt just last for today.
instead..it will drag over a time of period..
but then i was still feeling alright.
got to know that faggot2 is making a hell load of noise over something which she obviously did something wrong.
its because you did do something wrong thats why you're getting punished for it..so its fair and just what.
why are you complaining?!?

and then came chuiying who suddenly broke down and stuffs..
i was seriously worried for her.
as in, it was just a moment ago when i came to school with her.
saw her all fine and even drinking coffee.
was standing beside her for being late.
and yet so suddenly, things goes wrong.
that seriously made my day worst.

not having my phone with me means i cant contact anything or what to have the least idea if shes well or what.
and, i was already feeling down that my grandma was admitted into hospital last night for having a mild stroke.
so to me..i seriously do hope that people around me are well and fine.
i dont want anything to happen to them.
i might not seem as one who is so emotional, but deep down, i can get affected by the slightest thing that you might never have thought of.
i dont know how to describe how i feel.

and then next was scoldings from mdmashikin.
i seriously forgot about the knocking on the door thing.
and for that, im sorry.
and, i somewhat think that im really really very very very unlucky to be late today.
to be late when there was such a big crowd.
it can form at least 2 classes.
and whats more, i think that the humilation today was....nvm, forget it.

caiyan gave me a scare.
i guess it was really really pain for her.
but i being a friend, could yet do anything to help her-.-
and..i do want to act on my own actions to see if i could help to ease her pain.
but yet, i dont want her to think that im probing too much and maybe she wont like me doing things on my own accord for her.

i then started pondering about more stuffs.
like how fragile life is.
as in, i do know that life is fragile and stuffs and such.
but yet, the feelings i get after each things happen is way different from what i thought i might have felt.
i thought it would be nothing for me.
but it doesnt seemed the case.

got through the day and got home after lunch with caiyan,zhihui,qihao,gaoyang&chankai.
at least it brought me laughter.
but yet i still couldnt stop worrying for my grandma.
reached home and i broke down a little.
i dont know why but i just wanted to let things out.
furthermore, i think what happened on tuesday night made me worst.
my sis came home and she got a scared.
because, she has always known that i wasnt one who would tear so easily.
washed up and my sis decided to visit my grandma again with me though she just came back from there.
she was being damn nice for that.

saw my grandma.
she looked different.
as hers is not a full stroke, it wasnt that bad.
but somehow she just looked different and i badly wanted to tell her how much i cared for her.
but i just stood there while my sis talked to my grandma.
i guess i might not have learnt how to express myself out.
stayed there and went off after some time.
i wonder what my grandma will do throughout the night.
she wont have anything to do and no one will be chatting with her.
i feel sad. seriously sad.

i think i will stop here.
i cant take it again.
theres more things that are on my mind.
byebye.
everybody, do take care.

wont be replying tags today.
would reply it when i feel better.